AstroDispatch.com

Don’t Panic. Here’s a concept that a girl can get behind, especially in regards to the wild times we’ve been having lately. For those of you not familiar with The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy series (and in my humble opinion the films are rubbish–read the books), the premise of the series is to detail the zany adventures of an oddly matched crew as they cruise round the universe. The Guide is a Lonely Planet but for the entire cosmos, and like any good shoestring travel guide has recommendations for smooth travel. Carry a towel, for instance, and, written on the cover: Don’t Panic (first rule of the road).

As a young adult I loved these absurdist British books. One of my favorite images was the happy planet on the cover (I even silk-screened it onto a sweatshirt in Jr. High, along with the Don’t Panic). Little did I know that I would be a student of and later a dealer in astrological guidance and support, and those words would serve me well.

We’ve been knee-deep in serious planetary bizness these last months, and personally I’m getting a Pluto-Saturn sandwich (as you may have been following with recent posts) with a Neptune-Chiron filling that is doing a number on my insides. Yeah, me and everyone else. Or maybe you’ve got the spicy Uranus chicken wings kicking up a storm in your lower chakras. Whatever, the menu has not been for the faint of heart. A friend asked me the other day: Elia, are there any happy planets?

Typically when I’m asked a question like this, I say something along the lines of “astrology isn’t something to be afraid of . .. all the planets teach us and have our best interests at heart.” And I do believe this to be true. But, I lifted my face to the cosmos and cried, “Can a girl get a happy planet here?!”

Ancient astrology categorized the planets as malefic, benefic, or neutral. Some astrologers still subscribe to these beliefs, and specific systems, like Vedic astrology, make active use of the ideas that certain planets harm while others bestow benefits. I can get caught up in that too on a bad day . . . though I’m pretty vigilant not to drift into what an astrologer friend and I call “shadow astrology” or the fear based this-is-your-fate-too-bad kind of astrology. Still, when the heavy hitters are rockin’ the world, it’s nice to pan out to the whole planetary pantheon and see what the “benefics” are up to.

Venus and Jupiter are the “lesser” and “greater” benefics, and are the bringers of love, wealth, fortune, and blessings to our charts. Where they show up in your chart signals where you will experience expansion, optimism, connection, prosperity, and love. As transiting planets, Venus moves quickly through the zodiac, followed by more leisurely Jupiter.

Venus we know well, as the planet of L-O-V-E. She expresses, appreciates, harmonizes, delights, and yes, loves. Her location in our chart says, here is how I love and be-loved! This is the energy that delights me (by sign). Here is where I find my pleasure (by house placement). She transits the zodiac on a speedy little trajectory, spending roughly 20 days in each house/sign. This is fabulous as all our planetary points and areas of life will receive a little lovin’ within a relatively short time. Even the “hard” aspects of Venus are relatively mild–and short-lived. She is currently traveling through Capricorn, sprinkling fairy dust on our business or co-worker relations, sweetening our deals, giving our artistic endeavors some much needed structure, and lending us sincerity and integrity in our romantic relations. She’ll be right on top of Pluto soon . . . sexy! Venus wants us to enjoy, to understand that pleasure is our birthright. She opens the heart. She’s our lover, best friend, artistic patron. She’s a goddess of nature, art, fertility and balance. (And in 2012, we’ll get to see her rare transit of the sun!)

Jupiter spends approximately a year in a house/sign, so each sector of the chart will experience a period of growth and goodwill that we can actually notice. (Of course, each light has it’s shadow, and Jupiter is no exception–but let’s not go there now.) Jupiter has been laughing it up in Taurus since June but went retrograde in August. He will turn direct on December 26, and his energies will once again be more extroverted. In Taurus Jupiter loves the good life: sumptuous food, fine fabrics, plenty of music and love-making. He’s also especially connected to nature, and loves nothing better than to celebrate mama earth and her bounty, looking to put his feet in the dirt and feel the rain on his face. Globally we have an opportunity to recognize this treasure we live on and connect to abundance everywhere, and honor sustainability over gluttony (shadow Jupiter). Jupiter in Taurus asks us to see the plenty in the everyday, and to find ways to celebrate the “good life” in even the smallest moment. Maybe caviar and cashmere aren’t in your budget (or your style) but Jupiter asks: What blows your dress up, baby? You can have it . . . go get it! And for God’s sake, laugh! Jupiter is the energy of the Law of Attraction. Jupiter is your wise papa, your guru. And somewhere in your chart, he’s working for you.

So, back to the Hitchhiker’s Guide and the idea of fun and festive travel round the galaxy. Imagine if Venus and Jupiter were co-authors . . . Venus would advise a cashmere towel and definitely red lipstick for the ladies, and a good hat for the gents. Plus a full iPod. Jupiter would suggest your funniest book, a cocktail shaker and your yoga mat. If life is seeming a little, well, intense, these planets remind us to look to what we love, remember our sense of humor, and DON’T PANIC.

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